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Changes

Changing through growth and success - becoming a better person from prison with teachings and application.

Hello, gentlemen, and with dear respect and love I welcome you all.

After this last lockdown, I had lots of time to meditate, read, and reflect about many things, but most importantly about how I can apportion some wisdom to this beautiful and noble workshop, so that its efforts will not be in vain for any of us.

Then I thought to myself: “Well, you do enjoy writing because it puts you in a good mood and it exalts your wellbeing, so why not write something helpful and read it to the class?”

Therefore, beloveds, here is the following:

The teachings and intentions of this re-entry workshop are quite simple: to help us all.

All we must do is commit to its information, acknowledge it, and put it to good use, and will undoubtedly reap dear benefits. Sure enough, our minds can be a complicated thing. Most of our lives, our minds have complicated things through their own misunderstandings and false premises.

This may have come about through our environments and the way we’ve been conditioned—and thus, our ego structure has become somewhat complex.

It is not enough for our minds to accept that our essence is love and happiness.

It is more interesting if a lot of complex things have to be explained and understood for the mind to take pride in new discoveries.

Although this workshop is basically about making us aware of recidivist attitudes, the object of the course is such that the mind can participate in it fully. Because, if our minds are entertained long enough and taken out of their comfort zone, subtle processes that require time and continuity can take place. By doing the lessons and reading, reading, reading the manual and its addendum, our minds are kept occupied enough to provide this continuity and, therefore, breakthroughs can occur.

In a sense, this workshop is an unfolding of ever-expanding perspectives until finally we attain the perspective that is all-inclusive and accepting. Many of us suffer from certain beliefs that must be disputed and softened for our minds to be free. We must be flexible enough to flow with what is now, otherwise further growth will be very difficult, if possible.

To succeed in this workshop, we’re not required to believe in something (but ourselves) or even agree with anything (just the results). There’s nothing to accept on blind faith.

The validity of all this lies in our own experiences, our inner process. We don’t have to take anyone’s word for anything. The facilitators are not asking us to believe anything. It is our awareness/consciousness that will actually happen to us.

There is no dogma here, the only way we can truly benefit from the arduous work everyone has put into all of this is to put it into positive practice.

We must develop a vision and an awareness of that which we may presently be unaware of.

The majority of us are absolute beginners of the path of growth and awareness and may not have the slightest idea of what is being discussed here. All that is okay.

Even if we feel certain terms aren’t sufficiently defined, soon enough they will become part of our vocabulary. The important thing for now is that we have committed ourselves to this endeavor and, therefore, put the lessons and what we learn to practice. Very simple, no?


This re-entry workshop is for us to tune in and rid ourselves of the negative ego, become aware, and to understand how to apply its teachings to all the practical aspects of our daily lives. If we do this, we will see how our practices free us from the negative aspects and lead us to live a more fruitful existence.

Yes, gentlemen, I can attest that making changes may prove challenging, since bad habits are hard to break. But if we commit to becoming a better person, I can assure us dear benefits and successes. Just take a long view and accept that we may experience setbacks when attempting change.

Here are some guidelines I’ve come across in my readings to bear in mind when we anticipate the challenges ahead.

  • Remember that change requires committed effort and can cost more than we think, but shaping the life we want is worth the investment. Think about the resources—specially of our time, and what we will put into our change program.
  • Let’s choose methods that are right for us, not the latest get rich and happy quick theory. And, if something we try doesn’t work, let’s be prepared to reflect on the reasons and try something different.
  • Realize that willpower may at times be overrated. Most people cannot sustain willpower in the face of temptation. So let’s avoid actions, no matter how small, that jeopardize our goals.
  • Accept the fact that we almost certainly don’t make it a promise to commit to developing our awareness of ourselves so that we can replace habits that are destructive with ones that are creative and productive.
  • Promise to never accept second-best for yourself when it comes to you.
  • Promise to see and learn from all your experiences and actions.

 

“We change the world not by what we say or do, but as a consequence of what we become.”

 


“Happiness is a habit, not a destination.”


Please absorb. Good luck, and God bless.

Ernesto Cole

10 Secret Tips of Elite Changers

What are the 10 Secret Tips for Changing Your Life?

1 Developing Commitment — Wanting to make positive changes is very different from doing what it takes to make those changes.

The majority of us (if not all) want to succeed in this endeavor, as is evident by enrolling in this captivating program, therefore, I could positively assume we are willing and committed to make the necessary sacrifices, become ego-aware with hard work, and dedicated lots of our time and conscious energy to succeed.

That is why only a few are successful at the elite level.

Success must go beyond status quo.

The commitment is what’s going to help us constantly deliver results. This fortitude of character and strength of will is a quality that could be acquired by us all and become elite in our endeavor of change to help us overcome obstacles and beat the odds.

We can generate true commitment through small changes, setting achievable and practical goals one after another.

2. Visualization — Our actions follow our thoughts. This speaks not only to the power of positive thinking and self-belief, but also to the power of visualizing our success.

Studies have shown (and are still showing) that visualization produces the same muscle action as physical activity—the brain gets trained for activity through mental processes.

In many studies, those who use visualization alone improve their skill as much as those actually practicing the skill.

Amazing, don’t you think?

Many athletes use visualization to help them develop and solidify skills and practice their routines before a big event.

Likewise, we can use visualization to help us achieve our goals of not allowing the ego to decide on our behalf.

When practicing visualization, sit or lie in a comfortable position in a place with little or no distractions. Engage as many of your senses as you can, making an image as vivid as possible. See yourself not just achieving your goal of dominating your ego/negative thought, but enjoying the feeling.

Adding just five or ten minutes of daily visualization can help us achieve tremendous progress. Successful people have a tendency to see their future and then live it to existence.


3. Working With Fear — Everyone experiences fear. What will set us apart is our ability to feel that emotion but work toward our goal regardless.

We will not succumb to the inner critic, entertain limiting beliefs, nor negative individuals.

Fear will be a challenge for us, not a threat or defeat, and defeat merely an opportunity for learning we may fall/fail at times but will refuse to stay down. In order for us to succeed, we must take the risk of seeming soft and to take this risk, we must embrace fear and failure.

But guess what? Our desire to succeed will be greater than our fears. Let’s not over-analyze what we’re doing. Let’s just immerse ourselves in the process and “JUST DO IT!

There are many methods of working with fear and embracing failure. One such method is asking ourselves: “so what?”

What happens if I fail/fall and look soft?

The reality is never as scary as our imagination suggests, and it’s likely that if we did fail/fall, we will learn from it, become stronger, evolve, grow, and do it better next time around.

Additionally, if we did fail/fall, our loved ones (nor ourselves) are not going to laugh at us for attempting the right thing. Life will go on and we will have other chances.

If we do not make our goal of losing X amount of pounds by Y time, the world will not end and we can continue to make progress, right?

Fear is a False Evidence Appearing Real and when learning to recognize when fear is trying to make us small, we will be able to acknowledge it and respectfully continue working toward our goals.


4. Affirmation and Personal Belief — If you let it, doubt can destroy your intentions. We act in accordance with our own self-image, so is paramount for committed change seekers to believe in their own ability and right to succeed.

It is very common in interviews to hear Olympians and world-class athletes talk about their assurance about their ability to win. When you fail to believe in yourself, you create limits to your success.

You must believe to achieve!

Using positive affirmations is an excellent way to work toward self-confidence, self-belief, and owning your deserving happiness and success.

Try to replace your negative self-talk and criticisms with believable positive statements. You can also try creating a mantra you can say to yourself every morning and evening and in times of doubt. I believe that any successful person, including the elite athletes and performers, must dedicate time and energy to work through limiting beliefs.

If you want to achieve the goal of becoming a much more positive individual, you may need to do the same. In addition to plausible positive affirmations and mantras, a journaling practice, can be very helpful.

5. Cultivate Focus — Committed to chance individuals are highly focused on their goals and do not allow for distractions.

Most things come secondary to their goal, purpose, and intent that they create a lifestyle and support system to further their achievement. They have positive a one-track mind and are focused solely on becoming the best persons they can be.


With endless possibilities and opportunities available to us in this environment and all the daily distractions, it can be easy to lose focus on what matters most to us. Let’s take the time to reflect and clarify what it is we desire, what we will need to succeed, the action steps we will need to take, what we may need from others, and what (or who) we will need to give up in order to succeed.

Clarity creates focus, which breeds success.


6. Look For Support — I find it hard to believe of or encounter a committed changer without the help/support of a mentor/coach. Looking for and finding one is the next step to an elite level of change.

A mentor/coach will provide you with direction, advice, and a clear, intelligently constructed behavior program. Mentors/coaches are able to watch and follow your behavior and provide feedback you are unable to provide for yourself.

When you are feeling unmotivated or down, and most of us tend to at times, a mentor/coach is there to keep you accountable. Here in Edgefield are many programs with facilitators that would be more than happy to supply you with assistance.

I can personally vouch for the staff in the Psychology Department, the chapel, and many facilitators of those programs.


7. Practice What You Preach — It is fairly easy to speak nicely and positive, but success comes from the practice, practice, practice aspect of your words.

Whether you dislike putting your ego in check, seeming soft, or feeling disrespected, you must practice what you preach and put a positive perspective on any and all situations that arise if you truly wish to succeed in becoming an elite changer.

Remember, there is what happens and there is what perspective we put on it. We always have a choice and it is up to us (and not the situations or ego) to make it, feel me?


8. Always Keep Learning — Let today’s mistakes be tomorrow’s progress. Committed changers are always developing and honing their skills. The more they know and understand their mentalities, bodies, and egos, the better positive perspective they can give a situation and be much more likely to succeed.

Therefore, let’s read books of self-help and ways to better ourselves every chance we get. If our financial situation is a little tight, the Psychology Dept. and chapel are full of books and videos that can make our time worthwhile in visiting those departments.


9. Hone Your Nutrition and Activity Game — Committed changers know the necessity of a healthy body for the proper function of the mind, thus, they assure themselves a balanced nutrition filled with lots of the most vital nutrient available, water, and an active lifestyle.

Most importantly, proper nutrition is paramount to the success of a healthy endeavor and to succeed as a committed changer, it should not be overlooked. Combine the aspect of a balanced nutrition coupled with clean water and an active lifestyle, and you’re bound to experience successful results in that respect.


10. Create Goal-Supportive Habits — Habits are said to be the things we do without thought, right?

If it is so, the more we can convert to a healthy nutrition and fitness, the controlling/taming of the ego, the clean/respectful usage of speech and thought, the good intentions, and the demonstration of gratitude for the simplest of things, the less willpower we shall require in the future to stay positive and do right.


For the committed changer, following these aforementioned practices of healthy nutrition, working on skill development, visualization… all become habits over long periods of practice and are then logged into their subconscious, and, consequently, they do not spend time or energy thinking about doing the right thing: It’s a given!

In conclusion, comrades, while not all of us may make it to the elite level of changing (or may even want to), we can still benefit dearly from incorporating the practices of those who have… If only to become beneficiaries of the much-alluded-to and acclaimed Law of Attraction!

Success is a wonderful journey, gentlemen, not a destination or goal!

Thank you dearly for your time and attention, and, as always, God bless!

Ernesto Cole

Amateurs and Professionals

Amateurs and professionals - what is the difference?

Not too long ago I read a book that focused greatly on how to find and maintain ways to be happy and content in life, and came across something that echoed loudly within me to the point that I saw it in others as well that I decided to share it with you.

Therefore, if this resonates with you as well, please take heed.

Some of us specialize and devote all our energy to a particular activity, aiming to reach almost professional levels of performance in it. We even tend to look down and criticize anyone who is not as skillful and devoted to our specialty.

While those others prefer to dabble in a variety of activities, taking as much enjoyment as possible from each without necessarily becoming an “expert” in any one of them.

There are two words whose meaning reflect our somewhat warped attitudes towards levels of commitment to physical or mental activities. These are the terms amateur and dilettante. Nowadays, these labels are slightly derogatory. An amateur or dilettante is someone not quite up to par, a person no taken very seriously, one whose performance falls short of professional standards. But, originally, “amateur” from the Latin verb amare, “to love,” referred to a person who loved what he or she was doing.

Similarly, a “dilettante,” from the Latin delectare, “to find delight in,” was someone who enjoyed a given activity. The earliest meanings of these words therefore, drew attention to experiences rather than accomplishments. They described the subjective rewards individuals gained from doing things, instead of focusing on how well they were achieving. Nothing illustrates as clearly our changing attitudes toward the value of experience as the fate of these two words.

There was a time when it was admirable to be an amateur poet or dilettante scientist, because it meant that the quality of life could be improved by engaging in such activities. But increasingly, the emphasis has been to value behavior over subjective states—what is admired is success, achievement, the quality of performance rather than the quality of experience. Consequently, it has become embarrassing to be called a dilettante, even though to be a dilettante is to achieve what counts most—the enjoyment one’s actions provide.

It is true that the sort of dilettantish learning encouraged can be undermined even more readily than professional scholarship, if learners lose sight of the goal that motivates them. Laypersons with an ax to grind sometimes turn to pseudo-science to advance their interests and often their efforts are almost indistinguishable from those of intrinsically motivated amateurs.

An interest in the history of ethnic origins, for instance, can become easily perverted into a search for proof of one’s own superiority over members of other groups. The Nazi movement in Germany turned to anthropology, history, anatomy, language, biology, and philosophy, and concocted from them its theory of Aryan racial supremacy. Professional scholars were also caught up in this dubious enterprise, but it was inspired by amateurs, amid the rules by which it was played belonged to its politics, not science.

Soviet biology was set back a generation when the authorities decided to apply the rules of communist ideology to growing corn, instead of following experimental evidences, Lysenko’s ideas about how grains planted in a cold climate would grow more hardy, and produce even hardier progeny, sounded good to the layperson, especially within the context of Leninist dogma.

Unfortunately, the ways of politics and the ways of corn are not always the same. And Lysenko’s efforts culminated in decades of hunger.

The bad connotations the terms amateur and dilettante have earned for themselves over the years are due largely to the blurring of the distinctions between intrinsic and extrinsic goals. An amateur who pretends to know as much as a professional is probably wrong, and up to some mischief.

The point of becoming an amateur scientist is not to compete with professionals on their own turf, but to use symbolic discipline to extend mental skills, and to create order in consciousness. On that level, amateur scholarship can hold its own, and can be even more effective than its professional counterpart. But the moment that amateurs lose sight of this goal, and use knowledge mainly to bolster their egos or to achieve a material advantage, then they become caricatures for the scholar.

Without training in the discipline of skepticism and reciprocal criticism that underlies the scientific method, laypersons who venture into the fields of knowledge with prejudiced goals can become more ruthless, more egregiously unconcerned with truth, than even the most corrupt scholar.

Therefore, dear friends, let’s return to the origin of doing whatever it is we decided to do simply for the love of it, for the enjoyment we derive from it, and not because we’re seeking praise, fame, or anything material—but because we consider ourselves true amateurs or dilettantes.

Thank you very much for your attention and God bless.

Ernesto Cole

Relationships

The source of prosperity and success in relationships.

Greetings.

After being around for a while in this environment and others, I must admit that after falling victim/culprit to this flaw, I owe you the wisdom and experience learned from it and set the “record” straight, and hopefully you will reflect on it for the better of you and your relationships.

Additionally, having recently read a great book that touched expertly on this topic, I took it as a sign to share it with you.

Every single on of us, without exception, has a relationship with either our parents, progeny, siblings, significant others, coworkers, supervisors, friends, and so forth—right? Yet, not matter how pleasant some are, it can be very tiresome, draining, unfulfilling, or simply very miserable when they break down. And unfortunately, this can occur anywhere and to anyone, are you with me?

Therefore, we must realize, or accept, that we cannot, or should not, change other people. All we can do, or should do, is change ourselves, don’t you think? Secondly, when something someone does seems annoying, the annoyance is not in the thing being done, but in our response to the thing or action. In relationships, the most usual problem is when our egos are “hurt.”

We become annoyed or upset at the “homeboy,” the officer, the co-inmate, or whomever, because their attitude is such that it diminishes the importance our ego has attached to ourselves. We get annoyed at decisions or actions because they do not go exactly the way we, (our ego), would want them to go.

Someone makes impertinent remarks, or even loses his or her temper, and we retaliate—again the retaliation depends on the extent to which the ego feels threatened. The message, then, is that generally annoyance—or the loss of positive demeanor—in any relationship results from a feeling of the ego being threatened where the threat is felt certainly at both the subconscious and conscious level.

Consequently, even when the ego does not feel overtly threatened, human relationships can be improved here and there by deliberately going out of our way to be kind, loving, and helping others, or simply just listening and talking to them in a friendly way no matter how threatening or uncooperative they may appear.

This simply means maintaining a happy and loving disposition within ourselves no matter how others react. This partly comes from self-confidence, but it also comes from feeling relaxed—since relaxation brings with it contentment. Relaxation and annoyance are opposites. You cannot be relaxed and annoyed or angry at the same time.

Hence, the more you practice being relaxed at all times and in all situations, the more content you will be. Sure enough, I could continue this conversation and attempt to bless you with the way I practice to keep myself relaxed at all times, but will conclude with telling you that I am around and at your disposal if you’re interested in this little secret, deal?

Much love and as always, God bless!

Ernesto Cole

Love Is

What is true love in a relationship? What brings happiness, prosperity, and success? How can a relationship thrive?

Being happy for the other person when they are happy,
Being sad for the other person when they are sad.

Being together in good times and being together in bad times.

Love is the source of strength.

Being honest with yourself at all times,
Being honest with the other person at all times.

Telling, listening, respecting the truth and never pretending.

Love is the source of reality.

An understanding that is so complete that you feel as if you are a part of the other person.

Accepting the other person the way they are,
Not trying to change them to be someone else.

Love is a source of unity.
The freedom to pursue your own desires while sharing your experiences with the other person.

The growth of one individual alongside of, and together with the growth of another individual.

Love is the source of success.

The excitement of planning things together,
The excitement of doing things together.

Love is the source of the future.

Giving and taking in a daily situation,
Being patient with each other’s needs and desires.

Love is the source of sharing.

Ernesto Cole

Head Keeper-Uppers

How do you react? Your character is determined by what you do when you face problems.

Don’t let life discourage you. Everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.

When you stop striving to get better, you get worse.

You only fail when you never try.

Whatever your lot in life, build something on it.

The only limitations we have are those we acknowledge. Life is a feast, don’t starve yourself.

Don’t plan to fail by failing to plan.

Measure twice, cut once.

Focus on making things better, not bigger.

Live your life in exclamation, not an explanation.

Don’t be something—be someone.

As you go through life, never try to prove yourself—improve yourself.

By the work, one knows the workman.

When the chips are down, yell, “Bingo!”

When life hands you lemons—make lemonade.

Make a home in your heart for the truth and the truth will bring you home.

None are so empty as those that are full of themselves.

Ernesto Cole

Maxims To Live By

Wisdom from Within - by Ernesto Cole - Words and thoughts to live by with motivation and inspirtation for success and making the most of life.

1 You will always tend to see whatever it is you’re looking for. Your thoughts create your reality.

 

2. Deep inside we all want to love and be loved, to care and be cared for, and live happy… That is our essence.

 

3. Many of us spend so long pretending to be whatever it is that we’re pretending to be, that we lose focus of our true selves… The more energy we put into developing that mask, the more convinced we become of it.

4. Well-being is not is not the fruit of something you do, it is the essence of who you are. There’s nothing you need to change, do, be, or have in order to be happy.

5. My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the grounds upon which I stand.


6. Financial security doesn’t come from the amount of money you currently have; It comes from your ability to get more of it whenever you want.


7. Master the art of serving other and you will service your financial future. In this sense, money is just a measure of the difference you’re making in the world.


8. The problem cannot be solved with the same level of thinking that created it.


9. Your thoughts have no power, it is only when you invest your energy and consciousness into them that they begin to become real.


10. Life begets life, energy begets energy, it is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.


11. You don’t get what you deserve in life, you get what you negotiate.


12. Anywhere there’s a positive difference to be made, there’s money to be made. If you can’t (or won’t) make a difference, you’re unlikely to make very much money.


13. There are three essential motivations for anything and everything we do: Desperation (I have to), rationalization (I should), and inspiration (I want to).


14. I have my own version of an optimist: If I can’t make it through one door, I’ll make through another door or I’ll make a door. Something terrific will come no matter how dark the present.


15. The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.


16. Sometimes we stare so long at a door that is closing, that we see too late the one that is open.


17. Whatever has or hasn’t happened to you is in the past. The past does not equal the future. What matters most right now is your present-moment energy. You can direct your focus and language to create an amazing life.


18. Courage isn’t the absence of fear, but the willingness to proceed in the face of it.


19. There is no disguise which can hide love for where it exists, or simulate where it does not.


20. Coward, one who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.


21. Fools are without numbers.

22. To profit from good advice requires as much wisdom as to give it.


23. Measure not men by Sundays, without regarding what they did all week before.


24. When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.


25. A good word is an easy obligation. but not to speak ill, requires silence, which costs us nothing.


26. Try to leave the earth a better place than when you arrived.


27. Question: Do you know what the death rate around here is? Answer: One per person.


28. There is never enough “I love you”


29. ’Tis better than a man’s words, that another man’s words should praise him.


30. A warning given by an experienced person to someone willing to listen is more valuable that jewelry made of the finest gold.


31. While it is wise to learn from experience, it is wiser to learn from the experiences of others.


32. There’s not enough time in this life to learn by trial and error. Therefore, we must learn from the life lessons and experiences of one another.


33. If you have a bowl of murky water and want to make it clear, what would you do?

Ernesto Cole

Love Comes First

Wealth, Success, Love - three old men story fable - Ernesto Cole - Wisdom From Within

Love Comes First

A woman came out of her house and saw three old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard.

She did not recognize them.

She said, “I don’t think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.”

“Is the man of the house home?” they asked.

“No,” she replied.

“He’s out, then we cannot come in,” they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

“Go ahead and tell them I am home and invite them in!”

The woman went out and invited the men in.

“We do not go into a house together,” they said.

“Why is that?” she asked.

One of the old men explained. “His name is Wealth,” he said pointing to one of his friends. And pointing to another, “He is Success, and I am Love.”

The he added, “Now go in and discuss with your husband which of us you want in your home.

The woman went in and told her husband what was said.

Her husband was overjoyed. “How nice!” he said. “Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!”

His wife disagreed. “My dear, why don’t we invite Success?”

Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house.

She jumped in with her own suggestion. “Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will be filled with love!”

“Let us heed our daughter-in-law’s advice,” said the husband to his wife. “Go out and invite Love to be our guest.”

The woman went out and asked the three old men, “Which one of you has Love? Please come in and be our guest.”

Love got up and started walking toward the house.

The other two also got up and followed him.

Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success, “I only invited Love, why are you coming in?”

The old men replied together, “If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would’ve stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever he goes, we go with him.

Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!”

Love comes first story - wealth, success fable - Wisdom From Within - Ernesto Cole

Ernesto Cole

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